Tuesday September 25th 2012, 11:29 pm
Filed under: Non-Knitting

I told DebbieR I couldn’t remember the name of the type of wordplay that this belonged to, only that my mom had given me such a round of applause over it when I was a teenager that I actually remember what I came up with: I dropped the toothpaste, she said Crestfallenly.

Debbie sent me this link with examples like, That’s the last time I’ll stick my arm in a lion’s mouth, the lion tamer said off-handedly.

Okay, let me give it a try.

We need to call security! he said guardedly.

What are you doing, Captain–do you think you can just barge in like that? Wow (turning to the others) canoe believe it? (Turning back) Shape up and ship out!

I like the way you cut and colored your hair! she said in clipped tones.

I don’t like what you did to that window, he said in great fenestration.

Lemme decide where to plant that peach tree, she plotted.

It’s fruitless to try to make sense out of a toddler; they mango their words.

I think the stove is leaking! he gasped.

That’s not the fridge I want, she told the salesman coldly.

With this Hunger Games thing going on and the demand and prices going up, too many people are paying too much tax on Paul Ryan’s arrows, he said pointedly. I think you got the shaft.

I wouldn’t ever want to own an animal with a cloven foot, he vetoed.

Her enthusiasm for hazelnuts is well nutted.

There’s an artist with us in the marathon and I think he just broke his foot! the runner painted.

Ganache me what the chocolate is for, said the Greatest Cakes contestant; we’re going to get creamed!

Anyone else?

15 Comments so far
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They were called ‘spoonerisms’ after some Rev. Spooner who constantly got his tang toungled. He said he was tired of looking out at all the beery wenches when he meant ‘weary benches’ because they were empty for his sermons. I actually said that (tang etc.)inadvertently while explaining this to someone. And I said the crestfallenly! I’m sure! I remember making Mom laugh. But you could be sure too. Maybe we each contributed half of that pair of clauses. I’m sure we repeated it more than once…we tended to milk a good line. Anyway, that was a good one.

Comment by Marian 09.25.12 @ 11:59 pm

Spoonerism are like “God Bless Our Queer Dean” instead of “God Bless Our Dear Queen.”

I think think these are called “Swifties” after the children’s series about Tom Swift.

Comment by Abby 09.26.12 @ 4:29 am

When I was growing up we got New York Magazine (different from The New Yorker), and every week there was a wordplay contest at the back of the issued edited by Mary Ann Madden. The competitions were creative and brain-teasing, and the results published each week were hysterically funny. Ultimately several compilation books were published: Thank You For the Giant See Tortoise; Son of Sea Tortoise; and Maybe He’s Dead. I’m sure they’re long out of print, but I’ll hang onto my copies forever! My family has always loved wordplay. I think it keeps your brain young, and nimble! Here’s one for you, but I didn’t make this up. I actually saw it in an obituary a number of years ago: “Harold Surprise died unexpectedly.” Indeed.

Comment by India 09.26.12 @ 7:22 am

Again, my brain isn’t there… but this is a great little exercise. Thank you!!

Comment by Channon 09.26.12 @ 7:37 am

favorite spoonerism at our house: “pish pun” for push pin — it’s actually what we usually say!

I love your wit — I’m just too “brain dead” to match it today!

Comment by Bev 09.26.12 @ 8:06 am

Yes, I realized after I was in bed that ‘spoonerisms’ require the reversal of the first letters or sounds, and that’s not what these are. I think Abby is correct, ‘swifties’ sounds right. Both types are great fun!

Comment by Marian 09.26.12 @ 8:11 am

I don’t recall all of this, but I believe it was inadvertent: Introducing the Duck and Doochess of Windsor…

Don’t know if I can do these. I’m still working on yesterday’s word game. I’ll fill you in later, he said shoveling.

Comment by Don Meyer 09.26.12 @ 8:37 am

Well, I decided after Cub Scouts last Friday that I am a Din Leader. But that’s not wordplay so much as fact.

Comment by LauraN 09.26.12 @ 8:45 am

“You can’t pull the wool over my eyes!” she said with knitted brows.

Found in a teacher’s workroom this morning…..

Half the quotes on the internet are fake. —Abraham Lincoln

Comment by DebbieR 09.26.12 @ 9:54 am

Tom Swiftlies as I was growing up!

“I am the shepherd,” he said sheepishly.

Comment by Lizzie Kate 09.26.12 @ 10:53 am

What are those white dots high on the hillside? Sheep, OVioUSly!

Comment by Diana Troldahl 09.26.12 @ 12:15 pm

We often say ‘Swell Foop’ around here.

Comment by Diana Troldahl 09.26.12 @ 12:16 pm

I always get these things bass ackwards.

Comment by Karin 09.26.12 @ 6:19 pm

Lemme decide where to plant that apricot/plum hybrid tree, she pluotted.

Comment by twinsetellen 09.26.12 @ 7:01 pm

Yes Tom Swifties which is a subset of Wellerisms.

“it’s kisstomary to cuss the bride”. Instead of “It’s customary to kiss the bride” is a spoonerism.

It’s all fun.

Comment by Paula 12.04.12 @ 8:23 pm

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