Hi, Mom!
Friday February 13th 2009, 5:42 pm
Filed under: Crohn's flare,Friends,Knit,LYS

Mom called; I hadn’t posted yet today and she was concerned that I was doing okay.  (Yeah, Mom, I’m outing you, sorry.)  Message heard! Alive and posting!  Heh.

I wanted to go to Purlescence’s Knit Night last night, to the point that I deliberately kind of backed myself into it by calling them and saying I hoped to, and that if anyone happened to show up sick could they let me know so I could stay away?

When they heard my voice on the phone–actually, I had to identify myself, my voice is still raspy from that NG tube–the whole yarn store sent up a cheer.

That did it. I was going.

But by 7:30 I was also popping a hydrocodone to get me through it, and I avoid those and almost never take them till bedtime.  Oh well. I needed it.  My daughter, who I’ll call here by her nickname of Sam even though I obnoxiously still call her by her real name in person, did the driving.

We were about two blocks from home when she offered to turn around. I considered, and then said, no, let’s just go.  And go we did.

I stumbled in that yarn store door and into the arms and tears of my friends.  There were quite a few tears of mine going, too.  And then–

You remember Mary?  The one who made it so I could take back the shawl in the window and ship it to the woman whose husband had a brain tumor?

She handed me a circular lace shawl, warm enough for a lap robe as needed, absolutely exquisite.  I was blown away.  Later, home again, I laid it out across the top of the couch so it would again make my day this morning when I came out and saw it, and it did.  It’s gorgeous.  It’s Mary. It’s love made tangible.

Mary had lately had a project with a deadline, and she told me this other project–my shawl–nevertheless kept insisting it must go first. She couldn’t make herself get going on the deadline one till this other demanding one was satisfied and done; it just insisted it of her. And I was stunned.  And stunned that she must have gotten it done so fast. Stunned that I’d felt I needed to go that night, whether I was up to it or not, and here the shawl was and here she was and here I was and wow.

Now, Mary, I want to tell you the outcome of that and of seeing and hugging all of you. I went home with a sense of lightness that had been too long missing.  That was the first time in two months I had been in any building or room that was not my home, Stanford Hospital, or my medical clinic (and almost exclusively Urgent Care there).  Now I had been among friends.  I had taken a risk, I had stepped out to see if my body could handle an outing, and I had been treasured and loved and wrapped in comfort.

Last night, for the first time in two months, I was able to roll over in bed. By myself.  All the way from one side to the other.  This sounds silly, but I can’t tell you how huge it was.  I felt like I had crossed some invisible line: invalid, that side.  Starting to not be an invalid, that side.  And I was there.

The silly thing is I can’t find my camera nor can I find the one Kelli gifted me with a few days before I went into the hospital–I feel like Rip Van Winkle here.  They’re there somewhere, right in plain sight somewhere.

But Mom, that’s why I hadn’t posted yet. I have this exquisite shawl I want to show off and no pictures!


34 Comments so far
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YIPPEEE!!!! — Rich is wondering why I am sitting here with tears running down my face and there is just no way to explain all the things in this post that made it happen …

Comment by rho 02.13.09 @ 6:05 pm

I love you lady

Comment by Mary 02.13.09 @ 6:05 pm

I’m glad I got to be part of the moment when you walked into Purlescence. Unforgettable. It was so great to see you in person!

Comment by (formerly) no-blog-rachel 02.13.09 @ 6:23 pm

Wow…Knit night already! I had kind of talked myself into not expecting to meet you at Stitches…now I’m almost hoping, again.

Comment by Ruth 02.13.09 @ 6:46 pm

hmmm… overdoing it as usual… good for you…

I’m really happy you were able to get out and see friends. That does make a difference, doesn’t it? We love you and continue to pray for you.


Comment by morgan 02.13.09 @ 6:49 pm

I am so happy you were able to make it to the yarn shop. Please take it easy though, you are still fragile. Can’t wait to see the beautiful shawl.

Comment by sonya 02.13.09 @ 7:00 pm

I think this is where we say “turnabout is fair play”. I can’t imagine what you felt when you had your friends ambush you with the as yet unseen shawl. But I’ pretty sure it’s the feeling those other people got when you gave them you time and love in the form of a shawl…..

Comment by Carol 02.13.09 @ 7:21 pm

Wow! You are making such fabulous progress, Alison! Out at a knit night already. Awesome! I’m so glad you’re feeling better. You “sound” like your old self again, and that’s so wonderful to read. Looking forward to seeing pics of that beautiful shawl when you do find your camera. And congrats on being able to roll over again! That’s huge. I remember that same sense of triumph the last time I threw my back out, and I felt like I was finally getting better when I could change position in bed by myself, and get up by myself. It can only get better now, from here on. Just don’t overdo!


Comment by Paula 02.13.09 @ 8:01 pm

Mary did what we’d all like to do…gift you with a knitted gift of love. 🙂 I’m so glad you were able to go and be among friends, to receive the wonderful gift from Mary and to be able to turn over all by yourself…you’re making huge progress! And the cameras, my guess would be family members…they used them and didn’t put them back where they belong…just a guess. 🙂
Best wishes, Alison…I encourage you to just sit and enjoy your new shawl…and bask in the love! And when the culprit finally realizes they didn’t return your camera, we’d all love to see pictures of your beautiful, new shawl. 🙂

Comment by Abby 02.13.09 @ 8:09 pm

Why were you so surprised? Love given as freely as you seem to give yours is always returned in kind.

Comment by shadylady1216 02.13.09 @ 8:31 pm

God Bless dear you made my day!

Comment by Eileen 02.13.09 @ 8:35 pm

Oh, dear heart, what joy and healing we get from the love of our friends! I am so glad you were able to go, and so glad you got such a wonderful surprise. Isn’t it wonderful the way the universe gives us what we need, when we need it, if we remain open?

Prayers of thanks now!

Comment by Pegi 02.13.09 @ 8:47 pm

“It’s love made tangible.” you said in your post and it struck me that your book and your post illustrate how you do that with your knitting. I am glad to see it returning to you in such a fitting way. Sending wishes of continued healing! On a light aside – when you talked about rolling over, all I could think about was the song, “There was 10 in the bed and the little one said, “Roll Over! Roll Over!””. (Of course replacing “little one” with Allison! T

Comment by Tammy Morrow 02.13.09 @ 9:12 pm

What a perfect evening! Way to go, Mary!

May the glow of that group carry you through the weekend in happiness!

Comment by Barbara-Kay 02.13.09 @ 9:36 pm

You’re a treasure.

Comment by Marlene 02.13.09 @ 9:56 pm

So glad you were able to get out and see your friends and grateful that you shared that moment with us. I, personally, thank Mary for doing what I was unable to do,too.

Comment by Sherry in Idaho 02.13.09 @ 11:57 pm

OH, how wonderful to be out and about, light as a feather, and rolling in bed. Yay God! Saying many prayers of thanks tonight.

Comment by Renee 02.14.09 @ 12:06 am

All I can say is, Wonderful!

Comment by AmyS 02.14.09 @ 12:34 am

You couldn’t just send Simpkin, you had to go yourself ; ) Great news that you’re no longer stuck like Tom Kitten in Beatrix Potter’s “Roly-Poly Pudding.”

Any chance the camera and black cashmere are hiding together?

Comment by LynnM 02.14.09 @ 1:35 am

Thanks, Alison, for sharing this special moement in your life. I can’t wait to see the shawl. Mary is a special friend, indeed.
It’s wonderful to hear the progress you are making healthwise. Keep it up!!! Hugs!

Comment by Joansie 02.14.09 @ 3:06 am

how wonderful, a shawl for you! I am so pleased for you. I am thrilled you were able to go and see your friends AND get a shawl. I look forward to seeing it. Keep looking after yourself.

Comment by Vicki 02.14.09 @ 4:55 am

I’m so glad that you made it to Knit night. I hope it is the sign of many knit nights to come. Any so wonderful of Mary to gift you the shawl – you have gifted so many and you deserve one in return.

Comment by Allison 02.14.09 @ 8:37 am

Oh, that’s wonderful – every single bit of it. Having the energy to go, and having everyone there waiting to surround you with love, and the shawl, and rolling all the way over and everything. Hooray!

Comment by Jocelyn 02.14.09 @ 8:59 am

Wow, your progress back to feeling better is amazing. I’m tickled you were able to attend knit night. 🙂

Comment by Toni Smoky-Mountains 02.14.09 @ 9:10 am

Your camera is probably having a private rendez-vous with your black cashmere. I’m so glad you feel well enough to leave the house (even if you require an escort/bodygaurd) and that you can roll yourself over in bed without fear of great pain or splitting yourself open. There is hope that normal life will return.

Comment by LauraN 02.14.09 @ 9:30 am

We were all so glad to see you!! *hug*

Comment by Meg 02.14.09 @ 1:06 pm

Wonderful! So looking forward to seeing pictures of the shawl. I’m sure it’s beautiful.

Comment by Joelle 02.14.09 @ 2:35 pm

I almost never cry…but your post brought tears to my eyes…I am sooooooooooooooooo happy for you and the progress back to “normal”…

Comment by Betsy 02.14.09 @ 2:47 pm

I’m so glad to see you posting! And that you’re knitting!!! Those have to be good signs that you’re really feeling better.

Comment by Michelle 02.14.09 @ 4:11 pm

Wonderful wonderful. I’m so happy that you could go!!! That’s the kind of thing that will get you well soon. 🙂

Comment by Romi 02.14.09 @ 5:20 pm

I am crying reading this. This whole time I’ve been wishing I lived closer…what a wonderful scene you are describing.
To be able to turn over-you’ve turned a corner!

Comment by karin 02.14.09 @ 6:51 pm

How wonderful that you were able to get out and go, and how wonderful that you have such a cheer section of great friends. 🙂

Comment by Renna 02.14.09 @ 10:38 pm

Alison, I’m so glad that things seem to be looking up. And that you are persevering!

Comment by Amanda 02.15.09 @ 7:10 am

Hey, having had a c-section and, later, a hysterectomy, I can *really* relate to the “I rolled over in bed!” theory that it marks the beginning of feeling semi-normal! For the first couple of days, I had to get someone to hand me the blanket from the end of the bed–I couldn’t reach down and pull it up myself. (Hey, even my OB-GYN did it for me and tucked me in after checking in on me in the hospital! He’s a peach!) Sitting up without having to use my arms, shoulders, sides, hands, throwing a toot or leg…was a real point of accomplishment.
Glad to hear you got “out and about”.

Comment by Karen 02.17.09 @ 4:31 pm

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