Dyeing to tell the bride and groom
Thursday May 01st 2008, 10:26 am
Filed under: Amaryllis,Life,To dye for

some shrinkage may happenFirst, the technical stuff. After I dyed that Fino in amaryllises the other day, I threw in a 25 g ball of Elann’s Baby Silk, the last one from making the original Peace shawl. There was still some color left in the pot, and when I had a few more wilting red blossoms a few days later, I threw them in to boil too. I don’t know if it was the aging of part of the batch, but the pink was gone and what was left was a deep rust color. Not much of it, but enough to do something with. This time, using merino sock yarn, it took up very nearly every bit of color. Does this mean wool takes up amaryllis better than alpaca or silk do? Seems that way. Silk always takes up dye a bit slower anyway, which is one reason I love dyeing a silk/animal fiber blend: you often get a heathery effect with zero effort.

three stages of amaryllis dye and one blank

Meantime, I got permission to share this from Tunie, one of my readers, as my son’s wedding nears. This is the best piece of advice to a bridal couple I think I’ve ever heard; I really like it. She specified after sending this that no words need be spoken, the gesture is understood as is:

“We are celebrating our 40th anniversary in June and I think being good friends (we’ve been best friends since age 16) is one of the keys to a happy marriage.

Something a friend told me when we were engaged helped a lot when we were first married. If during an argument you want to say you are sorry, but are too stubborn, angry or are afraid it will continue the argument, give the other person a glass of water (we used a special silver goblet). It means I want this unhappiness to be over and we can resume discussion when we are calm at a later time. But let’s not continue holding the anger. If the other person drinks it, the anger is suspended. Believe it or not, it worked for us. It didn’t matter who was at “fault”, just that the feeling was not what we wanted to continue.”

Then she mentioned that they used the silver goblet just to make sure a crystal one wouldn’t get broken. We’re all human.

9 Comments so far
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Oh, how nice! Being best friends IS important. But so is being stubborn and lazy–as in, my word, it takes a lot of effort to get divorced!

Comment by amy 05.01.08 @ 10:57 am

What a great idea! I laughed about not wanting to use crystal though! Plus, crystal would probably hurt more if you changed your mind and instead of offering your partner a drink, you threw it at them.

Comment by Momo Fali 05.01.08 @ 12:39 pm

While your freshly dyed yarn is lovely, that story is definitely the star of this post. I think that I shall buy a special pewter cup for the purpose, and perhaps inscribe it with something…

Comment by Channon 05.01.08 @ 1:55 pm

That is a wonderful suggestion. It carries so much meaning in a little gesture. Thank you for sharing.

Comment by Sonya 05.01.08 @ 2:21 pm

Hi Alison, I’m so pleased you shared our “peace offering” story. I forgot to mention that I have given a non-breakable (usually Pewter) goblet with the “instructions” written in attempted caligraphy for wedding and engagement gifts.
The inscription in my husband’s wedding ring is “more than yesterday” from a saying he borrowed and would write to me: “I love you more than yesterday, but less than I will tomorrow.” That might be a good phrase to inscribe. I laughed about throwing it if changing minds. It usually took a walk around the block before it was offered. 🙂
Cheers from down under–Tunie

Comment by Tunie 05.01.08 @ 3:32 pm

Ha ha… I just read the goblet story to hubby and we’re sharing a nice chuckle. I think laughter is one of the key ingredients!

Comment by Amanda 05.01.08 @ 3:48 pm

Love the yarn color and the story! 🙂

Comment by Toni Smoky-Mountains 05.02.08 @ 4:55 am

Lovely story about the goblet, thank you for sharing!

There are two things I tend to tell folks, one about weddings the other about marriage.

About weddings: if you are marrying the right person, the wedding is a party to celebrate that fact — don’t get upset about the details of the party.

About marriage: remember the three C’s – commitment, communication and compromise. Commit to being married and staying married, figure out how the two of you (not someone else!) need to communicate with each other, and remember that you won’t always agree with each other but you can always find a comprise you can both live with. It’s work for us for almost ten years!

Comment by SaraJoan 05.02.08 @ 7:39 am

Hmmmmmm, I’ll have to try that with Brian next time he has a temper tantrum (usu not at me, but the effect is the same)and see if it defuses his temper 🙂

Comment by Danielle from SW MO 05.02.08 @ 8:01 am

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